Testimony

I am broken. I have had my wall of pride up for 21 years and I am broken. I have fallen into the temptations the world has thrown at me and I have cried in agony because I felt I had no worth. The Lord has called me to his side more times than I can count and I have refused to step out and serve Him. I am nothing without God and He is the only one who has saved me. I have been a christian since I was 7. I grew up in a Christian home and school with Christian values and morals but being a Christian is not about just saying the pray, it is about accepting Jesus and all that He entails and living your life pleasing to Him. That has been my hardest struggle but no longer my excuse. I have had a passion for missions for a long time and I ignored it selfishly. My testimony is in the making and my past has been forgiven but my future is in God and wherever He leads me I WILL GO!

Home Stretch

I have been reminded quite a bit about God's unfailing love. He ever so gently leads me in the direction I dare not go alone and yet I feel peaceful and trusting. He reminds me daily that it is not by my works that I am anything but by His grace and mercy that I can speak of His love. He has provided for me in subtle ways but yet they could never be mistaken for anything but His will. He has placed on my heart passions that at times seem impossible and overwhelming but I know that they are conquerable through Him! I am reminded to shout unto God with a voice of triumph and praise!! As the clock ticks faster and faster to the day I leave the comfortable and embark on the narrow road, I can't help but to be overfilled with joy and passion and purpose. I am no longer just saying, I am doing. It's time to stop speaking shallow words of an unfathomable God but instead to live life proving there is no other Creator, Author, Father, Forgiver, Provider, Savior, but God!

Doors are being opened for me to be able to speak about my Savior in situations that normally would never be brought up! I cant help but speak about what He is doing in my life and the excitement He has sparked in my soul! I will not say no to opportunities to serve my Lord, I will embrace them with open arms.

I have a choice at this time, I can stress and worry that I won't be able to raise the money I need before I leave or I can trust and pray that God will provide for me. I am $7,000 short but I know that there is no obstacle to big for my God! Times are hard and money is tight, but God is Great!!! Thank you to everyone who has supported me, I am truly blessed! I am asking for those who are weary about donating to pray. Pray that the Lord provides for you, that He gives you a peace in this time. He won't work if we don't give Him something to work with.

I want to leave you with these song lyrics, I think they sum up everything......
We mostly keep to ourselves 'round here
No sense rockin' the boat 'round here
We watch you dance into hell 'round here
It's time we speak His mind 'round here

Oh, so open your mouth, open it wide
Quit singing songs for a minute tonight
You can love with your hands, you can love with your deeds
How will they know if they know if we don't even speak?- Jimmy Needham

Fundraising

So fundraising is probably the most humbling thing I have ever done. Asking for help is not the most fun thing to do. Come to think of it not only is it hard to ask for help from people but it's hard to ask for help from God. Sure it's easy to ask God to give you things but to humble yourself and ask God to provide for you and to completly trust that He will take care of you is a toughy! This is something I am struggling with. Complete trust that my Lord will provide for me and that stressing and worrying isnt going to change that. He tell us that even the sparrows are taken care of, so why should we even fret?! I love that He cares for me so much that He would tell me that if I ask I will recieve. He is the creator and the provider and in Him and through Him all things are accomplished. We should not be ashamed to ask for help from our Lord!

Waiting

January is approaching fast and there is still so much that I need to do before I leave. I have been so busy working two jobs and planning fundraisers so I am just now sending out support letters. Seems like it's a little late in the game but I trust that God will provide what I need in the hour that I need it!

I feel so overwhelmed sometimes when I sit and think about leaving everything that's familiar to me to go to a place that is so unfamiliar. I have been struggling with the concept of waiting. I hate the transition mode! The other night I was doing my Beth Moore Bible study and ironically the whole thing was on waiting. She was speaking of Esther and how when it was time for her to be in the presence of her husband(finally!!) King Xerxes and he finally gave her an opportunity to ask for anything she wanted she chose to wait because she knew that the time was not right. Waiting is extremely exhausting! But the Lord promises us that "when we wait upon the Lord, our strength WILL be renewed" Isaiah 40:31. Our culture is training us in impatience and that is the very opposite of what God wants! In our waiting He is working! I wanted to share that with you because I know waiting is not easy!

If any of you want a support letter let me know and I'll be happy to send one your way! Until the next time I send an update, so-long and God Bless!!

Meghan!