My time in Bangkok

I have had a wonderful time in Bangkok. Before I arrived I expected that I would be doing some kind of relief work cleaning up after the floods, but to my surprise there was not much work left to be done. So then I thought I would do something with the children in the slums, but there were no ministries going out. I was beginning to get very discouraged, thinking " Lord, why am I here, what am I supposed to do? I am ready to serve but where?". Well, god had a different plan. You see, for the past 3 years I have started off my New Year with a missions trip, and it has been an amazing way to set the tone for my year to come. This year I think God is trying to teach me a few lessons, that I may otherwise have not understood had I not been here in Bangkok. The first lesson is that He is number 1. That idea seems so obvious and trivial but in fact it is the hardest thing I struggle with. I put God first in the big parts of my life; the decisions, my desires, my needs, but when it comes to the smaller parts (which combined make up the largest part of my life) I am putting other things as number 1. With the increasing use of the Internet and the ease at which it comes, I find myself checking my phone every five seconds just to make sure I haven't missed anything. I "stalk" Facebook throughout my whole day catching up on everyone's lives. I watch T.V. even when there is nothing to watch! No where in any of that junk am I putting God first! There is no way to justify it. God says thou shalt have no other gods before me....oops, I failed at that one big time! The second thing He is showing me is that I need to be more dependent and content in Him. I find myself always wanting something more. Whenever God provides me with something I don't always respond with contentment but rather with "what else?". Watching all of my friends getting married and having children and starting their new lives, I wonder "when is it my turn?". But I have realized something, I am not ready yet. I still have more to do for God. I still have more adventures that I need to have with God, just the two of us, and that makes me excited! It even makes me more excited to think of what my future husband is doing with his extra time alone with God! There is no greater joy to me than to be serving my God with all that I have, and to know that whoever He has for me is doing the same thing!  This time spent in Thailand has shown me that God truly cares for me. That He knows my desires and that He is not afraid to show me how fiercely He loves me! That His timing is perfect and that if I trust in Him, He really does know best!  Enough rambling....I have one more day in Thailand and then it is off to the Philippines! Whew, it's gonna be good!!!

Give it all away

On Thursday I went to the IDC, Immigration Detention Center, something I used to do almost every week when I lived here. It is a "prison" for people who violate their visa and either have no money to be able to go home or chooses to stay for fear of going back to an unsafe home (for a full description of what the IDC is you can read about it in a previous blog I wrote the last time I was in Bangkok. Blog site is meghanflammer.blogspot.com) I was assigned to bring out a Sri Lankan man named Mr. Balahamaran. He and his wife have been inside the IDC for a few years. Over the course of our visits to them they have accepted Jesus as their Savior! In fact many people have come to know Jesus inside this "prison"!!! What really struck me to the core was the amount of obedience this Sri Lankan couple had despite their current situation. You see, they have very little inside their concrete walls and chain fences, and what very little they do acquire could be used to help set them free or just survive day to day, but on this day they reached their hand over the fence and handed an envelope marked "tithe" to my Swedish Pastor friend, Daniel. Daniel and his wife and family have planted a church called lifecenterbkk, after being called away from Sweden by God to Thailand. They have been pastoring these people inside the IDC and now this Sri Lankan couple consider lifecenterbkk their church. It was so humbling and also convicting to watch a man walk in obedience despite being in "prison" and having no earthly possessions, give his money as a tithe to God's church. It reminded me of the story in the Bible about the widow who had only two gold coins but she gave all the she had. "And He sat down opposite the treasury, and  began  observing how the people were putting money into the treasury; and many rich people were putting in large sums. A poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which amount to a cent. Calling His disciples to Him, He said to them, "Truly I say to you, this poor widow put in more than all the contributors to the treasury; for they all put in out of their surplus, but she, out of her poverty, put in all she owned, all she had to live on." (Mark 12:41-44 NASB) What an example to follow. To give all that we have to God, even when it's hard and there may not be a lot. What fools does it make us if we give only to our comfortability? Does that say how little we trust and value or Savior?  Do we give our all to Jesus? Or do we only give what we have excess of? This story is extremely convicting to me and it is my prayer that I will walk in obedience and have enough faith in Jesus to give all that I have. 

Genesis 17:17 Abraham laughs at God

When the Lord told Abraham that at the age is 99 he would have a child of his own born by Sarah, he laughed at God. Even though Abraham had asked God to give him a child and the Lord had specifically said to him that he would make his descendants more numerous than the sands and stars, Abraham still doubted Gods ability to deliver on his promise. How often are we like Abraham? How often do we ask God for something and then when He finally says ok we laugh and say "you're kidding right, there's no way". Who do we take God for, a fool? Do we not really believe when we hear His promises that if we ask we shall receive. When we pray, do we have a heart of unbelief, do we come before God with trepidation, not believing that through Him all things are possible? When God tells us that he has something for us do we deny it because we believe there is no way it could be possible? I know I have laughed at God because He has called me to do things that are outside of the realms of possibility in my mind. I think "there is no way I could do that", Well DUH! Of course I can't do it, I can do nothing apart from God who created me. I can't even breathe apart from Him. If He can keep my heart beating and my lungs breathing he can fulfill a promise or provide a way to a means, that part is easy for Him. How is it that i think i can do anything in my own strength? When He wakes me up every morning I do not question how he did it or why, I simply praise Him for another day. Our first response to God should never be laughter or doubt. The gracious kindness of the Lord is the only reason He hears my laughter and doubt and still says "just wait and see".